Love Your Body
What Self-Care Really Means for Health
Redefining Self-Love in Midlife
February is often centered around love — but rarely the kind that focuses on you. For many women over 35, self-love has been tangled up in dieting, restriction, and the pressure to constantly change their bodies. But what if self-care didn’t mean another diet or quick fix?
Diet culture has taught us that health should happen fast and that success is measured by a number on the scale. Yet research and real life show that restrictive diets rarely lead to lasting results — especially for women navigating hormonal changes, busy schedules, and high stress. What does work is a sustainable approach to health built on daily habits, consistency, and care.
True self-care isn’t about perfection or punishment. It’s about creating a lifestyle that supports your energy, strength, and long-term well-being. In this post, we’ll explore what self-care really looks like for your health — and why lasting change comes from habits you can maintain, not diets you can’t wait to quit.
Why Diet Culture Fails Women 35+
If you’ve ever felt like diets just don’t work for long, you’re not imagining it — the science confirms it.
Short-Term Weight Loss ≠ Lasting Change
Research consistently shows that while many diets lead to initial weight loss, the majority of people regain the weight — and often more than they lost — within a few years. One comprehensive analysis of 31 long-term studies found that most dieters regain all of their lost weight within two to five years, with many ending up heavier than when they started. The researchers even concluded that participants might have been better off not dieting at all if the goal was long-term health. (1)
Another long‐term observational study showed that people who attempted dieting actually had greater increases in body mass index and waist circumference over time compared with those who did not diet, suggesting that dieting may be ineffective — or even counterproductive — in the long run. (2)
Dieting Can Take a Psychological Toll
Beyond the numbers on the scale, dieting doesn’t just fail physiologically — it can undermine your mental well-being. Research shows that engaging in fad diets is linked with higher levels of body shame, depression, and disordered eating behaviors compared with people who don’t chase quick fixes. (3)
There is also a well-documented cycle called “yo-yo dieting,” where people lose and regain weight repeatedly. This cycle increases stress, contributes to anxiety about food, and can damage your relationship with eating and your body. (4)
Hormonal Shifts Add Complexity in Midlife
Women in their 30s, 40s, and beyond aren’t just fighting diet culture — they’re also facing hormonal and metabolic changes that make restrictive dieting even less effective. During perimenopause and menopause, estrogen levels decline, metabolism slows slightly, and body composition changes — with increases in abdominal fat and decreases in muscle mass — are common. These natural shifts can make it harder to maintain the results of short-term diets without also addressing lifestyle factors like strength training, nutrient intake, sleep, and stress management. (5)
This is exactly why dieting — especially when it’s focused on restriction and quick results — rarely works long term: it doesn’t take into account the whole person and how metabolism, hormones, and psychology interact across midlife.
Why This Matters for You
If dieting hasn’t delivered long-term results before (or if it gave you short-lived progress followed by frustration or guilt), it’s not a reflection of your willpower — it’s how diet culture is engineered: promising a quick fix but failing to support sustainable health habits.
In the next section, we’ll explore what true self-care looks like for your health — the habits that do support your body, energy, hormones, and mindset in ways that last.
What Self-Care Actually Looks Like for Your Health
Self-care isn’t about doing more. It’s about doing what actually supports your body — consistently — instead of jumping from one extreme to another.
For women in midlife, real self-care comes down to a few key pillars.
Nutrition as Nourishment, Not Control
Self-care nutrition isn’t rigid or restrictive. It’s about fueling your body so you have energy, strength, and stable moods — not just chasing weight loss.
That means:
Eating regularly instead of skipping meals
Prioritizing protein, fiber, and balanced meals
Letting go of “good” and “bad” food labels
When nutrition is approached from a place of care rather than control, it becomes easier to stay consistent — and consistency is what actually leads to change.
Movement That Supports Your Body (Not Punishes It)
Exercise should never feel like punishment for what you ate or how your body looks.
Movement as self-care looks like:
Strength training to support muscle, metabolism, and bone health
Walking, hiking, or cardio you actually enjoy
Adjusting intensity based on stress, sleep, and life — not guilt
This approach helps women stay active long-term instead of burning out or constantly “starting over.”
Stress, Rest, and Recovery Matter More Than You Think
One of the most overlooked parts of self-care is rest.
Chronic stress and poor sleep can:
Increase cravings
Make fat loss harder
Leave you feeling exhausted and unmotivated
Self-care means giving yourself permission to rest, set boundaries, and recover — without feeling lazy or unproductive. Taking care of your nervous system is just as important as taking care of your nutrition and workouts.
When self-care becomes about supporting your body instead of fighting it, something shifts. This is where sustainable lifestyle change begins — not with motivation or perfection, but with habits you can maintain.
The Lifestyle Change Mindset: Playing the Long Game
The biggest difference between a diet and a lifestyle change isn’t the food — it’s the mindset.
Diets are built around an end date. A lifestyle approach is built around your life.
When you focus on sustainable habits instead of short-term results, the goal shifts from “How fast can I lose weight?” to “What can I realistically maintain?” That shift alone removes a lot of pressure and frustration.
A lifestyle approach means:
Building habits you can repeat even during busy or stressful weeks
Making progress without needing to be perfect
Understanding that setbacks don’t mean failure — they’re part of the process
This is especially important for women navigating hormonal changes, careers, families, and real-world responsibilities. Consistency doesn’t come from motivation; it comes from systems, support, and flexibility.
When you stop chasing extremes and start focusing on small, repeatable actions, something powerful happens:
You build trust in yourself
You gain confidence in your choices
Health becomes something you live — not something you’re constantly trying to “get back to”
Lifestyle change is about playing the long game. And the long game is where real, lasting results happen.
A Simple Self-Care Checklist for Sustainable Health
Self-care doesn’t have to be complicated to be effective. In fact, the habits that make the biggest difference are often the simplest ones — when they’re practiced consistently.
Use this checklist as a guide, not a rulebook. The goal isn’t perfection; it’s progress.
Daily Self-Care Habits
Eat balanced meals that include protein
Drink enough water throughout the day
Move your body in some way (a walk counts)
Speak to yourself with kindness instead of criticism
Weekly Self-Care Habits
Strength train 2–3 times per week
Plan a few simple meals or snacks ahead of time
Schedule at least one block of time just for you
Reflect on what went well instead of only what didn’t
Mindset Check-Ins
Am I making this choice out of care or punishment?
What does my body need today, not last month or last year?
Is this habit helping me feel stronger, healthier, or more confident?
If a habit feels overwhelming, it’s a sign to simplify — not quit. Sustainable self-care adapts as your life changes.
How Coaching Supports Sustainable Self-Care
Knowing what to do is one thing. Sticking with it — especially when life gets busy or motivation fades — is where most women struggle.
This is where coaching can make a difference.
My approach to coaching isn’t about meal plans you can’t maintain or workouts that leave you burned out. It’s about learning how to care for your body in a way that fits your life. That means:
Nutrition and training that are fully customized
A focus on habits, not perfection
Accountability and support when things don’t go as planned
Instead of asking you to follow rigid rules, coaching helps you build confidence in your own decision-making — so you’re not constantly starting over or questioning yourself. The goal isn’t just progress during coaching; it’s giving you the tools to continue caring for your health long after.
If you’ve ever felt like you’ve “failed” diets or programs in the past, this is your reminder: you didn’t fail — the approach just wasn’t sustainable.
Choosing Self-Love Beyond February
Self-love isn’t a 30-day challenge or a February trend. It’s the choice to care for your body through consistent, supportive habits — even when progress feels slow or life feels busy.
Sustainable health doesn’t come from extremes. It comes from learning how to fuel your body, move in ways that support you, manage stress, and build habits that fit your real life. When you shift your focus away from dieting and toward long-term self-care, health becomes something you live, not something you’re constantly chasing.
You don’t need another diet.
You need a sustainable approach to fitness, nutrition, and self-care that works with your body — now and in the years ahead.
If you’re ready to stop starting over and start building lasting habits, coaching can help guide and support that process when you’re ready.
1.UCLA Health 2.PubMed 3.PubMed 4.Psychology Today 5. PubMed+1